We are the only ones who appreciate each other's out of control outfits.
Your bff is all you need. Your my rock.
You rock.
Sick and tired of being treated like a pile of dog feces, Ashley had this novel idea that she wanted to give guys a taste of their own medicine, and date like a guy. You know, go out, have a great time, text him a smiley face as soon as he gets into his car and drives off, call the next morning, act interested for one week and then on the eighth day, break up via email. Ashley is a GENIUS. Men are total dogs. They are the worst. And I can vouch for almost every female by saying that men are definitely not humans.
Her novel idea kind of ... snowballed into one genius idea after another. She decided that browsing on match.com would find her the perfect candidate to torture. I had to get in on this, it just sounded way too entertaining for a friday night. A moment of silence concurred between us as we both searched for the victim. Eight minutes later ... "omg. This guy is my soul mate." NOT the comment I was expect to hear. "He loves to read and work out and he wants to travel to Europe." Focus Ashley, focus. Meanwhile, all I've found, was that there are a heck of a lot of guys in Jackson, NJ with cross eyes. (totally true statement, btw.) "OMG!!! We're getting married!!! He likes Shakespeare!!!!", she shrieks. Oh good grief. It would happen this way. You look intensely for the perfect man to torture with your man-eating skills, and you stumble upon the love of your life.
So, while Ashley is looking for ways to get out of the $30 membership fee to match.com, I will be sulking in my room, enduring another lonely night, hoping that my Mr. Right is out there doing the same thing and not out there on a date with some girl, treating her like royal crap instead of a royal princess.
Men - Can't live with 'em, can't chain 'em up in the backyard with the dog.....
