I had a silly away message up, saying that I was "Tailoring my dress." Which, I was. By the way, it came out insane. I have never owned a better fitting dress than the one I had tailored myself. Seriously. And I'm not just saying that because I tailored it, because I know dang well that the chinese lady at the dry cleaners down the street does a bomb tailoring job. But this, my friends, is a tailoring masterpiece. Anyways, a friend of mine had IMed me saying, "Isn't that what a designer is? A Tailor?" This struck a little cord with me. Yes and no. As a designer, I do things right the first time. You know, taking 1 kabillion measurements of one's body to ensure the perfect fit. This, of course, resolves any present or future take-ins or let-outs. (I'm not responsible for any chocolate, ice cream, or 1am chinese fixes that you might inhabit.) Although I shouldn't ever, I like to compare myself to Vera Wang: "You don't alter Vera to fit you, you alter yourself to fit Vera." For any of you that know about fashion, clothing - whether it's making your own or finding an insane vintage piece, you can vouch this as truth. Sometimes, you just have to make you work for the clothing, not the clothing work for you.
It is SO weird to hear someone say, "You're works always comes out beautiful."
Say whaaaaat? It's SO weird to hear that. I mean, I hear people say, "You make really awesome stuff.", or, "You're gonna sell that, right?" Never once have I heard someone call myself, "beautiful". It was ... well ... nice. Designers are so insanely critical of themselves, it's ridiculous. I think it's safe to say that we're almost egotistical, how critical of our work we are. I can make the most perfect looking garment, and it is still not good enough to me. The only want to describe it, is like this ...
Picture your absolute dream that you want to live. Whether it's moving to a gorgeous island, doing exactly what you want to do in life, or doing something that you're 1,000% passionate about. There is no possible way to transfer that dream into a reality. That's what it's like for me. Being a fashion designer with my own company and my own line has been a dream of mine since I was six years old when my grams taught me how to sew pillows for her dolls on her 1920's sewing machine. (which I gratefully inherited) I have images in my head of things that I would die to create and accomplish, it's just not physically possible. What you envision in your heads, is so hard to turn into a reality. It's mind blowing to think that you're right there, creating your dream. You almost don't even want to accomplish what's in your head, because that means that you've reached your goal, and that it's time for another goal.
I want my goal in life to be long lived. I don't want to have a dream and a vision in my head and just find the solution to topping off that dream. I want to build myself bigger and better than I ever thought I could be. Because nothing is better than coming so close to your own dream, only to force yourself to do better.
